Okay homeschool confession time.
For my entire life, I have compared myself to people I admired. They were people who seemed to have it all, and who were doing everything I dreamed of doing — writing, speaking, traveling the world, and using their gifts to make the world a better place. I did the same with homeschooling.
If you are a member of that club, you know how truly miserable it can make you feel.
I imagined the ‘successful’ people had access to all the things I needed and wanted. Things like more money, all the right connections, and a pulled together life that spewed rainbows and ponies.
Thankfully, epiphanies finally do reach my addled brain. A bit slower these days, but I get there.
I needed to stop wasting my time energy getting sucked into the homeschool comparison trap. Even as an over ten year veteran to homeschooling —the comparison vortex can be strong. Are we doing enough? Am I enough? Is it ever enough?
I learned an important lesson about Homeschooling and life in general recently. Every one of my assumptions about what ‘successful’ people had or did, were total B.S. Facebook paints a pretty idyllic picture of most families. But what we don’t see or observe is the day to day crap that we all go through. We don’t see the missteps and failings, but rather the perfectly successful homeschooler who knows all the resources, avenues, and benefits of home education. It’s like looking at the skinny model in the fashion magazine. We still compare.
The reality is that most of us live in fear that we will not be good enough, and that plays out in homeschooling too. That we won’t be a good wife, mother, teacher, business owner, or person. That we don’t have anything unique, worthwhile or important to say. We worry that people will judge, criticize and call us out on our shortcomings. We all have limiting beliefs about ourselves, our self-worth and what we are capable of accomplishing. I think it’s part of human nature and finding your true self.
We need to stop that. There is room enough for everyone. We need to stop the B.S., and stop being a crap magnet for everything that could, should, and might go wrong. We need to stop comparing ourselves to others. But oh boy, it ain’t easy! The brain chatter never stops. Stop giving the crappy stories head space and room to grow.
Homeschool parents are warriors.You absolutely have the ability to actualize your children’s deepest and truest potential. You can do that in YOU too.
But, what holds most of us back are excuses. Excuses about why other people can do things better, faster, and easier in homeschooling, but we can’t. Or our children can’t. We self-destruct before we even begin.
So what’s holding you back in homeschooling your children or creating a ridiculously positive experience?
It’s likely you. I know it’s me. I am my own worst enemy.
But with caring, committment and determination, it’s time for homeschoolers to build a fabulous homeschool experience using our unique strengths and skills. YOUR unique strengths and skills and those of your children ARE what make it incredible.
Our homeschool stories are diverse and inspiring, and we should draw strength from those on the journey with us. Strength. Not comparison.
We all deserve the chance to live an extraordinary life — regardless of what labels we “think” we’ve been assigned in life. Our children deserve that too.
So what’s stopping you?